To begin with, I want to say that being a mother is difficult and that the choices that you make are your choices to make. Whether you breastfeed exclusively, use formula exclusively, or some combination, I commend you on making that choice for yourself and your child. If you decide to baptise your infant, have a B’rit Milah or B’rit Bat, whisper the Adhan, say a sacred pray, or eschew all of these things as silly and unnecessary, I’m good with that. If you are not physically, mentally, or emotionally abusing or damaging your child(ren), I have very little to say to you.
But, there is another type of mother that I find myself wanting to run from at every opportunity. I think that we all know this mom, I’m sure that we’ve all been this mom at some point, and I’m positive that we were all this woman before we had children. Judgmental mom. Today, at Target, which seems to be the second home of Judgemental mom, I encountered a pack of these women. Also, what is up with the mom packs? I have literally no friends and I’m a nice person. Back to the experience, they are loudly commenting on this other mom’s inability to get control of her 4/5-year-old son. They were loud enough that she could hear increasing volume. The boy’s mother was trying to soothe him, talk to him calmly, and avoided looking him directly in the eyes. She was trying to slowly move him out of the store. My best guess is that the boy has an autism spectrum disorder. I say that because I hear the beginning of this breakdown. The mother and son were in the bathroom and the toilet flushed. The boy began screaming about the noise being too loud and wanting to leave. He became increasingly hysterical with every flush in the next minute. I saw two minutes of this woman’s life, and I wished that I was able to do something to make it easier. All I could do was smile as I walked past her, and promise myself that would remember that there is often far more to the story than we see. It isn’t fair to make a judgment based on our narrow and biased opinion.
I also promised myself that as my toddler grows older, and we interact with more children that I would rather remain solitary than to become part of a pack of judgmental moms.